This is a second post in the blog series: dating.

You might want to read Intro Part 1 before continuing to read this post.

The first thing I want to do is give a context from which I am writing from:  If you were to put five Christian couples and five non Christian couples in the same room and asked them questions about dating, there is a good chance that they would be acting the same way and doing the same things. Christian dating has become so like the world of dating, its hard to tell them a part. Since the Bible does not give us a roadmap on how to date, we have to be wise, as christians, in finding the best way to do so. I strongly believe that the Bible gives us enough tools and truth that we can apply as to create a healthy roadmap for all dating.

I think the bible gives us some great passages to guide us through the process of dating. 1 Thessalonians 4:3 says It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says flee from all sexual immorality. In Genesis 2:24 the Bible says that the two shall become one flesh. I think we can all agree that oneness is the basis of marriage. From the principle of oneness, I believe that we can start the conversation of dating. If you are not one with an individual, how do you handle yourself when dating them? Before we look into that, we need to learn where modern dating has come from historically.

The practice of dating is very modern. Dating first started with the idea of people courting each other to find a partner. Dating was less of a social activity and more of a formal process.  Most likely dating for social reasons  started around the jazz age. Note that social dating at that time was still tame because pre-marital sex was not a societal norm. Once the sexual revolution started, I think we can assume that’s when modern dating started to really take place. Old fashion views of dating in groups and under the guidance of family and friends were thrown out the window, and an understanding of “anything goes” kind-of-dating began.

I was recently looking through some class notes from college and came across my professors thoughts on when to start dating.

• When you are fully aware of the danger and benefits of dating.
• You have worked out a list of dating standards.
• You have worked out in your heart to not lower personal standards.

As I look through my notes, I thought it was great, but I think there can still be a couple more things on the list.

• You have worked on yourself and have prayed that God would make you the right person for someone else.
• You have asked yourself, are you filling a void in your life or filling a desire.

I feel that when we date we try to figure out if the other person is the right person for us. This is great, but Is it the best way to approach dating?  Instead, we should be praying and working on our own garbage, so when we go and date, we aren’t trying to share/pile our garbage on someone else for them to deal with it. We need to pray for God to make us the right person to serve our future spouses needs and to individually be a Godly husband or wife.

Check back this Monday for week two on dating (a blogging series)